Daily Scripture Reading Ephesians 5:3-33

Part of the conventional wisdom in modern society is that men need to earn the respect of their wives. Many authors, both Christian and non-Christian, tell men how to do this. Furthermore, those authors tell men that it is their own fault if their wife does not respect them.

Today we will read a verse that teaches the opposite. According to Paul, husbands are not responsible for earning respect from their wife; instead, wives need to take the initiative to respect their husbands.

In chapter 4, after writing about the importance of knowledge and speaking the truth, Paul began giving practical commands regarding theft, anger, and speech. Christians are to be imitators of God and walk in love.

Eph. 5:3 ¶ But sexual immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints;

There are three categories of sins listed in this verse: sexual immorality, impurity, and greed.

Think about the phrase “must not even be named”. Christians should be known for the absence of these sins. Unfortunately, sexual immorality such as sex outside of marriage, out of wedlock birth, adultery, and remarriage are too common within Christianity. These sins are so common that most Christians have become numb to them and don’t treat them as the stains that they are.

Eph. 5:4 nor filthiness and foolish talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.

This verse has an additional list of things which should not be named among Christians. Christians should even avoid foolish talk and course jesting.

Several decades ago, there were taboos within Christianity against using swear words and filthy language. Much of those taboos have dissipated in recent years. Today, I frequently hear and see Christians use swear words in media and in person. This should not be. The church needs to re-establish the taboos against using bad language.

Eph. 5:5 For this you know with certainty, that no one sexually immoral or impure or greedy, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.

Eph. 5:6 ¶ Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

Eph. 5:7 Therefore do not be partakers with them,

Eph. 5:8 for you were formerly darkness, but now you are light in the Lord; walk as children of light

Eph. 5:9 (for the fruit of that light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth),

Eph. 5:10 trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.

Eph. 5:11 And do not participate in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead even expose them.

Eph. 5:12 For it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret.

Eph. 5:13 But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.

Eph. 5:14 For this reason it says,

“Awake, sleeper,

And arise from the dead,

And Christ will shine on you.”

This verse is quoting another writing, but the wording is vague and it is not clear if Paul is quoting scripture or a non-biblical writing. Having said that, this quote is very similar to Isaiah 60:1.

Eph. 5:15 ¶ Therefore look carefully how you walk, not as unwise but as wise,

Eph. 5:16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

Eph. 5:17 On account of this, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Eph. 5:18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,

This verse does not prohibit drinking alcohol, it only prohibits getting drunk.

Eph. 5:19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;

Eph. 5:20 always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father;

Eph. 5:21 and being subject to one another in the fear of Christ.

Eph. 5:22 ¶ Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

This is an area where the modern church has surrendered to the culture. Many churches, or so-called churches, still give lip service to the idea of wives submitting to their husbands, but when you look at how most Christians live their lives and how church leaders counsel husbands and wives, Christianity has redefined submission to the point that many Christian wives are not actually submitting to their husbands even though they claim they do.

One way Christianity has rationalized away the command for wives to submit to their husbands is verse 21. Some pastors say that since verse 21 tells all of us to submit to one another, then that means wives do not need to submit to their husbands.

However, verse 21 is talking about how Christians should relate to other Christians within the church. Within that framework, each wife needs to submit to her husband.

Eph. 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.

Eph. 5:24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.

Notice the clause “in everything”. Wives need to submit to their husbands in every area, not just some areas, not just important areas, or not just unimportant areas.

Eph. 5:25 ¶ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,

Just as wives need to submit to their husbands, so too husbands need to love their wives. This verse defines love as self-sacrifice and being a protector.

This is an area where Christianity has not necessarily given in to the world, but we have been compromised by feminism. Men used to open doors for ladies and have the mentality that men need to protect women. Feminists claim they don’t need men to help or protect them, so today few men act chivalrously, and men increasingly have the attitude that women can take care of themselves.

Eph. 5:26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,

Eph. 5:27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she would be holy and blameless.

Eph. 5:28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;

Eph. 5:29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,

Eph. 5:30 because we are members of His body.

Eph. 5:31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.

Eph. 5:32 This mystery is great, but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.

Eph. 5:33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.

Ponder the significance of the phrase “the wife must see to it”. It does not say wives should respect their husbands if and when they deserve it. Nor does it say husbands should earn the respect of their wives. Instead, it says each wife is responsible for respecting her husband. There is no qualification to this. Each wife must take the initiative to respect her husband even if he doesn’t earn it, demand it, or deserve it.

This is contrary to feminist ideology as well as teaching that is common within the church. Many writers, both Christian and non-Christian, tell men they need to earn the respect of their wives. However, Paul put the burden of responsibility on the wives. Wives are commanded to respect their husbands. Wives need to be proactive about this and take the initiative to do it.

To what extent have you bought into the errant philosophy that wives are justified in disrespecting their husbands if they do not earn respect?

What should change in your marriage in light of Paul’s command telling wives they need to take the initiative to respect their husbands?

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“Scripture quotations taken from the (LSB®) Legacy Standard Bible®, Copyright © 2021 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Managed in partnership with Three Sixteen Publishing Inc. LSBible.org and 316publishing.com.”